Am I sabotaging myself?

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I usually put my dreams in my dream blog but this dream felt more fitting for this blog.

My mind works in mysterious ways.

I had another crazy dream and dreams within that dream last Saturday. The gist of the dream was me having a night terror in the ‘form’ of my oldest sister. I say form but there really wasn’t anything there except for the pillow I placed behind me before sleeping. My twin-sized bed has been feeling larger and larger by the day. In the inception dream, she constantly held me in a tight hug while stroking my head. It was creepy and hair-raising, so I’m constantly trying to wake away from her.

At one point or two, I feel that I’ve truly awakened but I’ve been tricked yet again.

In this inception-like dream that I had, my sister or what seemed like my sister repeated to me some words- “he doesn’t know”. If I recall correctly, and I don’t, that’s what she said. Every time I ‘woke’ up, I would run to my mother and recollect the whole even to her to which she then redirects me to the local priest. I didn’t know this priest. He was dark-haired, bearded, and looked like any other guy. But it seemed he knew what my sister was trying to say. This scene repeats and again, he knows.

Little things changed once I realize, I’m paralyzed. So I try not to fall asleep in my dream but then every time I tried not to, I would my mother call out to me outside my room. It wasn’t until the actual morning that I learned my mother hadn’t called me at all. But she did so, twice in my dreams. She tells me, it’s a good thing I hadn’t answered, that superstition says, replying to a faceless voice is dangerous. In the dream, I had ignored her because I knew it wasn’t time to go to church yet. I still had hours to go. And if she really wanted me to get up, she’d come in my room. So, I continued to dream and the dream continued to be strange. At one point, My mom, some guy I didn’t know but did in the dream, and I found a lost and injured dog at a crossroad while on our way to visit the church- this church doesn’t exist in real life. My mom told me, the priest would know what to do. So, I approached the dog much to the guy’s chagrin and picked her up. She took to me easily and I to her. Once we arrived, there the priest was again. Instead of welcoming us, we had actually interrupted one of his sermons. We decide to wait at the sides until he saw us. He walked over slowly. We told him about the injured dog and it was true, he knew what to do. We left the dog to him.

This dream I had gets jumbled up in my head with a dream I had, from a nap the day before. Yet, for some reason, it all fits together. In the other dream, I injured myself on the same leg as the dog. I couldn’t walk properly. I was saved by a girl- I say saved but really what happened was she served me the cinnamon roll and lemon meringue pie I’d been trying to get throughout the dream. She was beautiful. And all the boys had been bullying me or ignoring me. She on the other lend a hand to me.

I don’t know what my dream means but my mind works in mysterious ways. Sometimes, I think it sends me signals that I would otherwise ignore. I just wish I knew what it all meant.

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